Penthouse worth $8.95m – Sexiest on the Coast

Penthouse, anyone? This two-storey “skyhome” sits on the top of a brand-new beachfront boutique building at 3533 Main Beach Parade. Nicole Buckler checks it out.

Penthouse sexiness: enough room to house a minimum of 7 elephants

Penthouse Hotness

The Gold Coast is the most beautiful place to live in the world. And, a penthouse is one of the nicest ways to be hoisted above it. But, you can buy a hell of a lot of house for $8.95 million, so why would you decide a penthouse is a superior choice? Maybe you are one of those people who like other humans enough that having neighbours seems like a really pleasant idea. Your lift ride is the longest, so small talk must just be your thing.

pool on balcony in penthouse
Penthouse life is tough.

Your Highness

Maybe you like the feeling that no one can rob you up this high, and take your Ken Done artworks from 1982 off the wall. You can lock the door behind you knowing that no one is going to scale the building to steal the crown jewels that everyone thinks you have (remember: you sold them to buy this place). Perhaps you just like being the King of the Hill, residing in the crown of a building. And there it is – the sense of “arrival.” It is the main selling point here.

balcony, beach, couch, penthouse
You’ll never need a hairdryer here, the sea breeze has got your back.

There’s no feeling like being in an elevator and pressing the PH button. It’s all part of that penthouse feeling. This penthouse does have its own private lift though, so you don’t get to show off with your button-pressing. On the plus side, you don’t have to consort with the help. Phew. Small talk is awful.

full building view from beach
Beachfront living: Noice.

Architectural Hotness

This place is really going for the “arrival” allure. Designed by acclaimed architect, Bayden Goddard, it has flawless marble, limestone, travertine, timber and stone finishes throughout. In this exquisite masterpiece, no expense has been spared.

pool on balcony at the top of the penthouse
Penthouse life: Does not suck

Life in this penthouse is set against the backdrop of uninterrupted Pacific Ocean views. They stretch endlessly along this famous coastline. The 8th-floor wraparound terrace is all yours. You can float in your gorgeous top-floor pool and take it in all.

penthouse back balcony
Penthouse back balcony: For sunsets and undressing the manservant with your eyes.

And yet, the main question remains: Can I do a nudie run around the balcony and swim naked? Of course, it looks like a hard no, unless you want pictures of you on the internet taken by the peasants living in the neighbouring buildings.

kitchen in penthouse
For all the things you will never cook at your penthouse.

Penthouse Instant Popularity

If you have some mooching friends, then this place will be their new crash pad – the property has 4 bedrooms, 4.5 bathrooms, plus a temperature-controlled wine cellar, so they can drink all your fancy wines too.

The gourmet kitchen has a scullery, top-of-the-line Gaggenau appliances, integrated fridge and dishwasher, plus built-in wine fridges and a deluxe marble island bench – for when you never cook but your manservant surely does.

another view of the front balcony
gThere’s a lot of balconies here. A lot. We are going to need them to be Google mapped.

Glass Hotness

Oversized glass windows frame the light-filled living and dining areas. This is to showcase the spectacular vistas. It is a haven for soaking up sunrises and sunsets. You can look forward to visits from people who will pretend to like you so they can hang out there.

louge room overlooking beach
The zebra-skin stools are the hidden image bonus here.

You’ll also be able to extend the party out to the travertine-tiled terrace, which fuses effortlessly with the indoors and offers picture-perfect coastal panoramas. There’s no getting away from it. This is the sexiest place to get drunk on the Gold Coast.

night views from penthouse
The view by night is even better. And, I am guessing that if you own this, you would be too rich for mosquitos.

You CAN Buy Taste

The upscale elegance continues with the bedrooms, where you can wake to the sounds of the waves rolling in. The master suite occupies the top floor, along with an open-plan study. It is here that you can study your Bitcoin wallet and work out what other prestige properties you can buy to do more nudie runs in.

penthouse office
Penthouse offices: Tough places to work.

For couples, you will each have your own dressing rooms. Plus, there are his-and-hers marble and limestone ensuites. Yes, your place to VIPoo is your very own. Of course, the bathroom has a sumptuous freestanding bath. And, let’s not forget the heated towel rails, for those three nights a year that the temperature goes below 1000 degrees Celsius on the Gold Coast.

Watch surfers fight over waves and call each other names like “kook.”

Sexy Penthouse Sleeping

The remaining bedrooms reside on the lower level, with two of them offering walk-through robes and all fitted with stylish ensuites, accented by Crema Marfil marble and Limra Limestone. They all have ocean and hinterland views. When you wake up you can hi-five passengers on the Scoot flights that roar down the coastline to the Gold Coast Airport.

bedroom overlooking the beach
All-round glass: Sleeping in the nuddie not recommended.

The oak herringbone floors are amazing. They have acoustic underlay in the living areas and master bedroom. So the people downstairs won’t hear you making your home pornos upstairs.

Location Hotness

The location is second to none – close to Marina Mirage and Tedder Avenue café and restaurant precinct. So when your manservant runs away for a better life, you won’t go hungry or thirsty. Remember, in this place, it’s all about you.

amazing balcony views
The best place in the world to waste your life on Facebook.

Penthouse living does have incredible advantages. You don’t have upstairs neighbours to keep you awake with stilettos clacking in the middle of the night. You are away from the noise of the street (mainly made up of people like me complaining about my shoes hurting me at 3am). And you have magnificent, unobstructed views. And what better place for said views than the Gold Coast. You have security that you don’t get with a house at ground level. However, in the event of a fire or earthquake, just remember that you will be the last out. So don’t forget your escape helicopter, just in case. Surely, there’s enough room to park it at the top – I mean, look at all this space. You could swing 27 cats in here.

penthouse bathrooms
Penthouse bathroom: Where 220 neighbours can watch you do nudie dives.

Yes, this is the life. When your ship comes in, this is definitely where you should park it.

Update: This place sold a few weeks ago. The monthly mortgage repayments were a mere $30,528, according to the loan calculator on the page. Eye watering stuff. You may have missed out on this place, but there are other real estate investments worth looking at. Check this out.

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